Every time you do something wrong, people immediately tell you.
Every time you do something right, people take it as normal.
If you load scales only on one side only, they tilt.
Like at a school test, where every right solution is taken for granted, it doesn't get a green mark, and every wrong solution is marked with a fat red circle.
It's so strange that we tell people everything we like, the shows, the books, the looks, the hobbies. But we hold back when we see something we like about them.
It's one sided and it destroys people's self-image. It breeds doubt in one's own skills and capacities. It imposes a fear of being pointed at when we make a mistake.
What you can do?
1. Care for yourself. When you do something well, tell yourself. Tell yourself you are capable of this. Tell yourself you did this right. Tell yourself this is a skill of yours. Tell yourself you can use it to do good.
2. When you see something admirable in another person, tell them. Maybe you will be met with a strange stare in the beginning, but genuine praise like that feels good to everyone deep down, even if they don't want to show you. Don't be excessive about it, don't make it a drama. But if you think something is amazing about someone else, just tell them, like you would tell them every other like and dislike in the world. Make it normal, a part of daily life and with time, people around you will catch up to it.
And you never know. Sometimes a single short empowering sentence, that you maybe don't even remember for long, can make all the difference in a person's life.
"I trust you."
"I believe in you."
"You got this."
"I'm glad you're there."
"I'm happy to have you."
"It feels good to be near you."
"I'm proud of you."
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